An Open Letter on the NBA Bubble

Dear NBA Overlords,

I’m glad you’re back. Congratulations! The bubble you’ve set up seems to be locked in for the long haul, after multiple league-wide tests confirmed no active cases of COVID-19. After 133 days without basketball (not like anyone was counting), I would’ve accepted anything, but the state of play in Orlando has been genuinely fun to watch. Playing games in small arenas was clearly the right move: the Premier League and MLB have shown us that phony crowd noise in giant stadiums only highlights the lack of fans in attendance. You’re also crushing making each game feel important, as every team is trying to push for the playoffs, as opposed to waiting for the three games they can hit the Houston Astros with pitches.

That being said, there are a couple of aspects about the bubble that I think can be improved. I understand that some bells and whistles had to be slashed in the name of safety, but with just a few changes, the NBA bubble can become a truly iconic moment in sports history.

For example, take a look at the ‘fan section’ from a recent Los Angeles Clippers game.

Why are there so many empty seats? From an entertainment standpoint it’s a puzzling choice, as the lack of a full virtual audience makes the game seem less important.  Even if you want to argue that empty seats make for a more realistic experience, I’m not sure they do! The Clippers have sold out all of their games this year. Why should the bubble make them (or any other team) look like they can’t draw a crowd?

On that note of committing to realism, why have the overlords cut out the halftime show? Don’t the virtual fans need something to view when the game is paused? This could be an event in itself–maybe not reaching the heights of the Super Bowl Halftime show, but nevertheless being an entertainment spectacular.  Of all the terrible things that have gone down this year, I think we can achieve some karmic balance by making the Red Panda a national celebrity. Plus, as we get deeper and deeper into the playoffs, I’m sure plans can be made for higher profile performers to drop in and get some much needed time in the spotlight. 

If we’re trying to come up with more ways to keep the broadcasts engaging, riddle me this: why is Matisse Thybulle’s YouTube channel the only way to learn about daily life in the bubble? ESPN can’t pull a Big Brother and hide cameras across the campus, but surely they could arrange for a camera to follow Mike Breen around for a day or two. The possibilities are endless: imagine Doris Burke smack talking Mark Jackson on the golf course, or an inside look at whatever Kevin Harlan is taking that makes him inhumanly enthusiastic. Wouldn’t you rather watch that than hear about Brad Stevens’ polo shirts for the fifth time?

Visually, I can’t help but feel that the presentation of the bubble has been…plain.

I don’t think the NBA could come up with a court that looks more generic. At least have the home team’s logo at center court. This is the time to experiment! I think a black court with white lines could give the bubble a very distinctive look, but if the NBA wanted to go with a brighter court such as Utah’s or Brooklyn’s I wouldn’t complain either.

Additionally, I think some nostalgia catering is required to boost the visual palette of the tournament. Everyone on the internet loved the Utah Jazz and Memphis Grizzlies busting out their classic uniforms, so let’s take it a step forward. From this moment forward, each team should be required to only sport classic uniforms. They’re bright, colorful, and will surely help out some fans of the league who’ve grown disconnected to the modern style of play.

I’m aware that these changes will have to be paid for. To counter that, I have a business proposition that will allow for both more profit and more entertainment. For a fee, let the fans listen to the entire feed of players who’ve been mic’d up for national TV broadcasts. In the name of decency I would accept a seven second delay, but if there’s ever a time to give the fans access to the unadulterated level of smack talk on the court, it’s now.

One more small ask: let’s not treat the bubble like we’ve cured world hunger. Especially in a structure that relies on preventing anything from getting in or out, outlasting COVID-19 will be a marathon, not a sprint. I understand that the bubble has gone well so far, but shouting celebrations from the rooftops while having played only a week of regular season games feels too early. Remember, this bubble was one crummy Lou Williams decision away from bursting. If a champion isn’t crowned, all these games are meaningless, no matter how long they go on. But until the trophy is handed over to the eventual winners, I look forward to seeing what innovations are to come.

Yours,

Adam